To paraphrase a Saltykov-Shchedrin aphorism I cited the other day, Trump’s task seems to be keeping the world in a state of constant bewilderment.
One day he moots the possibility of invading American allies Denmark and Canada, along with some small fry like Panama. Then he puts that idea off, instead trying to shut down international trade or at least suffocate it with irrational and vindictive tariffs. The next moment he lowers the tariffs, only then to raise them again, evidently deriving joy from watching people suffer dizziness and vertigo.
The world gasps on cue, then to be told it was the Ukraine that attacked Russia, not the other way around. Hence Trump suspends all aid to the Ukrainian aggressor, only to resume it, albeit on a limited scale, a week later.
And so on in the same vein: the roller-coaster of what passes for Trump’s thought shoots up at breakneck speed, then dips even faster, distorting the faces of those unable to keep up and scared of falling out.
Yet even against that background, Trump’s latest escapade takes the cheesecake. The Donald gratefully accepted the gift of a luxury Boeing 747-8 jumbo jet from Qatar. The plane is to be used as Air Force One while Trump is in office, and as his personal ride thereafter.
Oh, of course the jet won’t be his personal property de jure – that would be too much even for him. After a long career of bankrupting his Atlantic City casinos and balancing on the knife edge of the law, Trump can handle loopholes with the dexterity of a Parisian Gobelins maker.
The plane will be transferred to Trump’s Library Foundation, which will probably keep the men in blue off his back. But that will be a distinction without a difference. Niceties observed, he’ll then use the jet as he sees fit.
Predictably, this grossly immoral, nay amoral, act has created a mighty backlash in all sorts of quarters – and not only among the Trump haters on the Democratic benches. Even fully paid-up, card-carrying, cap-wearing MAGA zealots are aghast.
“I think if we switched the names to Hunter Biden and Joe Biden, we’d all be freaking out on the right,” said Daily Wire co-founder Ben Shapiro, whose politics place him firmly to the right of Attila the Hun’s security chief (I mean this as a compliment).
I’ve been proposing similar switches for a long time. Just imagine the weeping and wailing and gnashing of MAGA teeth had Hunter Biden said: “In terms of high-end product influx into the US, Russians make up a pretty disproportionate cross-section of a lot of our assets.” Or, “We don’t rely on American banks. We have all the funding we need out of Russia.”
Screams of ‘Conflict of interest!’ and ‘Impeachment!’ or even of ‘Treason!’ and ‘Imprisonment!’ would be bursting out of every MAGA mouth in a geyser of spittle. Yet the two statements were made by Trump’s sons, Donald Jr and Eric respectively, and MAGA mouths stayed shut, giving us all a welcome if brief respite.
Even Laura Loomer, whose adoration of Trump is nothing short of erotic, was aghast: “I love President Trump. I would take a bullet for him. But, I have to call a spade a spade. We cannot accept a $400 million ‘gift’ from jihadists in suits.”
The idea of Laura taking a bullet for Trump or indeed for anyone else isn’t without a certain appeal. But calling a spade a spade could get her into even bigger trouble in the current climate.
Trump dismissed the naysayers in a manner almost refreshing in its unalloyed cynicism: “I think it’s a great gesture from Qatar. I appreciate it very much. I would never be one to turn down that kind of an offer. I mean, I could be a stupid person saying ‘No, we don’t want a free, very expensive plane’.”
That Trump, with his amorality, both innate and lovingly cultivated over a lifetime, would never be the one to turn down a bribe, provided it’s big enough, is self-evident. As is the fact that his action is grossly unethical. But is it also unconstitutional?
Not according to Attorney General Pam Bondi, a comely blonde Trump found uniquely qualified to hold the top legal post in the US. Far be it from me to question her credentials, which do look a bit scanty, but in her pre-Trump life she was a lobbyist for Qatar. I’m not saying this ipso facto disqualifies her from ruling on this case, but, for appearances’ sake if nothing else, she should have recused herself.
In fact, Article 1, Section 9 of the Constitution forbids any US officeholder to “accept any present … of any kind whatever from any King, Prince, or foreign State” — without congressional approval. Commentators who mention this loophole usually add that it’s meaningless in this case since this Congress will rubber-stamp anything Trump wants.
Judging by the reaction of some of his closest supporters, I’m not so sure. If just a handful of Republicans oppose this gross corruption, it may never happen, and one hopes that there are some Republicans in Congress who don’t think morality and honour have a monetary equivalent.
When I first saw the photographs of the plane’s interior, I was sure it was designed by a Qatari artist with an eye on the emirs’ taste for kitschy opulence. I was then surprised to find out that the plane was actually designed by a reputable French firm, Albert Pinto Cabinet.
Surely they ought to know better? They probably do, but any commercial firm has to cater to the customers’ tastes. Had Albert Pinto designed the same Boeing for, say, King Charles III (not that he could afford it), it would look very different.
Suddenly it hit me: the interior of the plane was designed with the end user in mind. Aesthetically, it’s a flying Trump Tower, with its glistening gold paint everywhere, including on the walls of reflective gilded corridors, and the general air of tasteless gaudiness.
Yet the problem here goes way beyond aesthetics. Trump is urinating from the roof of his tallest tower on the dignity and honour of his office, one that demands qualities in excess of bean counting.
Accepting such a gift from anyone brings the institution of the presidency into disrepute. But the matter becomes infinitely graver when we consider the donor.
The plane is the quid (or rather 300 million quid at the current exchange rate). What’s the quo? For little in Qatari history supports the view that it’s bursting with affection for the US and the West in general. Its sympathies lie elsewhere. In fact, Laura Loomer’s description of the gift-bearers as “jihadists in suits” is spot on, and she now rates a footnote in my good books.
Since Hamas seized Gaza by force in 2007, Qatar has pumped some $1.8 billion into the territory. And after the 7 October massacre of Israeli civilians, Qatar’s foreign ministry released a statement holding “Israel alone responsible”.
Doha’s five-star hotels hospitably house Hamas dignitaries, such as Ismail Hanyeh, chief of Hamas’s political bureau, and Khaled Mashal, head of the Hamas diaspora office. The two jihadists are worth over $4 billion each, by the way.
In June 2017, Saudi Arabia, the United Arab Emirates, Bahrain, and Egypt severed ties with Qatar and imposed a blockade on the country. Saudi Arabia said it did so to “protect national security from the dangers of terrorism and extremism,” while the UAE pointed out Qatar’s “ongoing policies that rattle the security and sovereignty of the region.”
Such considerations apparently don’t prevent the president of the United States from accepting gifts from Qatari “jihadists in suits”. Provided the gifts are expensive enough.
Vlad Putin, take notice, you’re on next. May I suggest a yacht worth more than $400 million? Yes, that should work.