
Reacting to Trump’s remarks, both oral and written, Zelensky sounded optimistic: “I think we have better relations than before,” he said. “I see very positive signals that Trump and America will be with us to the end of the war.”
The president of a country locked in a desperate fight for its survival has to inject a positive note into his remarks. His job is to rally his people, not to provide a dispassionate analysis.
I don’t work under similar constraints, which is why I’m asking the question in the title. And the answer is: nothing much, nothing new, nothing encouraging, nothing upbeat.
Back in the old days, Sovietologists used to analyse the abstruse speeches of assorted Party secretaries, trying to discern hidden meanings and decipher encoded subtexts. There’s no such need with Western leaders.
Though they don’t always mean what they say or say what they mean, they tend to be more forthright and less Aesopian. Their meaning may not always be on the surface but usually it’s not far beneath it. One doesn’t have to delve too deeply to uncover the nugget of substance or at least realise that none exists.
Trump regularly breaks this tendency, either deliberately, to obfuscate his message, or accidentally, due to his uncertain grasp of the English language. Sometimes he sounds like an old man lost in the verbal thicket; at other times like what Americans call a Polish godfather (he makes you an offer you can’t understand).
In any case, Trump is the president of a major military power that’s supposed to be on the side of the angels. That’s why a new genre of textual political analysis is called for. Let’s call it Trumpology by analogy with Sovietology. Let’s also admit that any budding Trumpologist faces a challenging task.
A good diplomat knows how to say nothing, but say it well. Trump’s recent remarks on Putin’s war against the Ukraine show he is only halfway there. He said nothing. But it sounded like something.
First, he complained that Putin had let him down. The choice of words is telling: one can be let down only by a friend, not an enemy. If the betrayal isn’t too bestial, the friend may be forgiven, brought back into the fold, and cordial amity may survive.
Further, Trump told reporters: “I thought [ending the war] was going to be the easiest one because of my relationship with Putin. Unfortunately, that relationship didn’t mean anything.”
That’s saying the same thing in different words: with his unerring instinct of a career KGB recruiter, Vlad paid gluteal obeisance to Don to establish a “relationship”. However, fancy that, much to Don’s surprise the KGB officer then indulged in underhanded dealings that put the relationship on hold.
It wasn’t damaged beyond repair though. Asked if he still trusted Putin, Trump said he would have an answer in “about a month”. This means he is uncertain whether Vlad is still “a great guy”.
He didn’t specify what momentous events would occur in a month to make Trump certain whether Vlad still was his friend, one way or the other. If I were to venture a guess, Putin has been given another deadline, twice the length of the several fortnightly others that friend Don has announced and friend Vlad has ignored.
When asked if the US would support Europe should it come under Russian attack, Trump answered “Yes”. But not unreservedly so:
“Depends on the circumstance. But, you know, we’re very strong toward Nato. Nato has stepped up. You know, when they went from 2 per cent to 5 per cent, that was great unity. Trillions of dollars is being pumped in and they’re paying us for the weapons that we sent.”
“Trillions” is a slight exaggeration, but what’s a couple of orders of magnitude among friends? But do let’s continue.
“I think Ukraine, with the support of the European Union, is in a position to fight and WIN all of Ukraine back in its original form. With time, patience, and the financial support of Europe and, in particular, Nato, the original borders from where this war started, is very much an option.”
In my self-appointed capacity of Trumpologist, this is what I think Trump said. He is prepared to sell weapons to European NATO members, perhaps not quite trillions’ worth, but a lot.
What those Europeans then do with those weapons isn’t Trump’s concern. If they choose to give them to the Ukraine, he won’t say no. And if they want to shoot marauding Russian planes down, by all means, they should go ahead — ‘they’ being the operative word.
So what exactly has caused Zelensky’s fulsome joy? Nothing new was said. What was said is that selling “trillions’ worth of weapons” to Europe is the extent of American support for the Ukraine. Using those weapons, and “the support of the European Union”, the Ukraine can WIN all of its occupied territories back and, as Trump also suggested, even go beyond.
What, all the way to Moscow? Even the most gung-ho champions of Ukrainian independence don’t suggest that as a possibility. Trump isn’t suggesting it either, not really. He is just restating, in his own semi-literate manner, the status quo.
He likes the profits America is getting from arms sales to the EU, but those who think the US would step in to thwart Putin’s aggression have another think coming. Nor is America going to arm the Ukraine directly and free of charge. In other words, yet again Trump said nothing new, and he didn’t even say it well.
P.S. Unemployment looms large in America: Trump is doing his level best to make satirists and parodists redundant.
Even on the rare occasions when he doesn’t say something objectionable, like calling Putin “a great guy” or claiming that the Punic Wars wouldn’t have happened had he been president, his oratory never fails to make one wince. It’s as if his objective were to MAKE AMERICA GRATE AGAIN.
Sometimes the effect isn’t just grating but also risible, so much so that no satirist would find it easy to add anything to it – and that’s with Trump’s prepared speeches, never mind those he delivers off the cuff.
This point was made with admirable subtlety in this little video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxECyQO5y-8
An English woman with a perfect upper-middleclass accent and a vacuous upper-middleclass smile reads the speech Trump delivered at the state banquet in Windsor the other day. The mischievous woman didn’t change a single word, and she put all the emphases in the right places.
And still there was much weeping and wailing in the corner of the earth inhabited by parodists. No matter how witty and waspish they might be, they couldn’t extract any more comic mileage out of Trump’s waffle overladen with superlative modifiers.








