Spare a thought for Woolwich police

A friend of mine, a card-carrying fruitcake and swivel-eyed loon, may be British, but he simply doesn’t understand how this country works.

In his blog today he bemoans the tardiness of Woolwich police who took twenty minutes to arrive at the scene of yesterday’s massacre. Instead of being angry, he should instead give thanks that they arrived at all.

By doing so, our brave PCs put themselves in jeopardy. Even as we speak, they risk censure for at least three aspects of their action.

First, we must keep in mind that the lovely chaps who hacked the soldier to pieces are black, which ipso facto makes them existential victims. Moreover, not only have they been victimised themselves, but they also carry in their hearts the genetic memory of centuries of oppression and suffering.

Admittedly their suffering may have been less acute than what they inflicted with their meat cleavers, but it still can’t be dismissed lightly. Taking vigorous action against them could very easily be construed in some quarters as racial discrimination.

Now that crime, as I hope we all realise, is much worse than cutting a man’s head off. The poor chaps may have attacked a man, but abusing them in any way could be tantamount to assaulting their whole race. Hence it’s no surprise that Woolwich PCs, whose job description can also stand for Political Correctness, had to stop and think before acting.

Second, the victim-criminals are also pious Muslims, which they proved by shouting ‘Allahu Akbar’ while chopping through those neck tendons. As such, they are answerable to the Sharia law which does provide for killing infidels.

I hope you’re not going to suggest that there’s anything wrong with Islam, or that it’s in any way inferior to any other religion, including the superstition that fed our society for the better part of a millennium and a half. It isn’t. In fact all faiths are equal, which is why our next monarch is going to defend them all equally. Quite right too.

My friend is himself a priest, so he must be comfortable with the notion of God’s laws taking precedence over secular ones. By murdering that soldier, the two chaps acted in accordance with the higher law. Fair enough, theirs may be different from my friend’s, but who’s to say it’s inferior? Certainly no one who wishes to avoid the charge of inciting religious hatred.

Such considerations no doubt detained the policemen even further. And that’s not all. The PCs knew that the criminals – nay, suspects! – were armed with aforementioned meat cleavers and also with guns. Since no one has yet repealed the law of self-preservation, the policemen, properly forewarned, had to forearm themselves with firearms.

Since they don’t habitually carry them, such inherently immoral weapons are kept under lock and key. There has to be a certain procedure for signing them out, and that sort of thing can’t be rushed.

I’m guessing here, but elementary PC morality must demand that appropriate forms be filled in triplicate and properly filed. Doesn’t my friend believe in Original Sin? He claims he does. Well then, policemen, being fallible and indeed fallen, must be kept a safe distance away from weapons they could use as tools of racial and religious discrimination. It’s for their own good, not just for the safety of our oppressed minorities.

Having checked the guns out, the policemen then had to spend some time pondering what they were going to do with them. The spectre of prosecution for using excessive force and therefore committing an unlawful killing must have loomed large, causing yet another delay.

Also, since for reasons stated above their weapons training must be limited, they had to spend a minute or two figuring out how put the magazine in, pull the slide back and slip the safety off – all without injuring themselves or innocent bystanders.

All things considered, it’s amazing they arrived after barely twenty minutes – and then actually assailed the blood-soaked suspects with guns. Mercifully, they didn’t kill them, for this would have constituted a wanton taking of two human lives. True, the suspects are themselves suspected of having taken a human life, but two wrongs don’t make a right, do they now?

What’s encouraging is our PM Dave’s resolute response. Pulling no punches, he referred to the Woolwich attack as ‘deeply shocking’. That’s the right thing to say, no doubt about that. ‘They [the wounded suspects] should know something like this will only bring us together and make us stronger,’ promised Dave.

Of course it will. Dave’s record of keeping promises being of sterling quality, we’ll rally together, close ranks and join Dave in campaigning for unlimited Muslim – and any other! – immigration. The odd hiccup notwithstanding, multi-culti diversity is what will ultimately make us strong.

Given such future empowerment, what’s a minute here or there among friends? A mere triviality, an insignificant fragment of the big picture. I do wish my friend could realise this.



P.S. In my yesterday’s piece, I erroneously identified Dominique Venner as a Catholic, which he wasn’t – mea culpa. This explains his chosen form of protest, to which I took exception, and also vindicates my suggestion that one doesn’t have to be a pious Christian to oppose same-sex marriage. Even the cloud of sloppy research is sometimes not without a silver lining. 



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